Good Counsel

 Good counsel






     Greg earned a reputation of being quite the curmudgeon in his last years. I admit the decription was accurate darn near and sometimes his gruff takes could be over the top. In some ways it was amusing but sometimes Ed and I would just laugh it off with raised eyebrows since hating the Little League world series might seem weird. It is human nature for people to get tired of objects or people getting too much attention and it was completely logical for the guy to claim the Kardashians gave him a pain in the (take your choice.) It would be unacceptable to him to be portrayed as a wimpy sentimentalist but I submit his wise counsel and gentle support saved my mental health many times. Greg was an excellent listener and he was not the kind of person who interrupted and gave silly advise that was just a knee-jerk reaction. He allowed you to spill your guts and waited until you were completely finished before saying a peep. The one thing he  let you know when you were broken was that he was going to be there to pick you up off the floor when you went down. I count eight broken hearts I had with Greg in my corner. I am not talking about lost infatuations but true pain that made me think I could not live another day. I had romantic losses that took years to heal from and deaths of loved ones that just left an open wound. The week my ex-wife took my reason for living and moved her fifty miles away Greg just put a welcome mat out in front of his home and kept me from commiting murder. He answered the phone when I was driving home desparing from OC or Cerritos cheerfully and when I was lost and lonely he invited me over to watch a game or have dinner. He and Lissy took me to the Disney Concert Hall when I saw little to smile about and I luxuriated in the beauty of Bear Cove when my parenting was twisting in the wind. If you want to know the essence, the impossible value of friendship I can name dozens of simple rescues he made without hesitation. Perfect examples were the terrible times when my own blood made my home a danger zone and I woke him out of a sound sleep to make a bed for me at Francis. This is not even mentioning the solid shoulder he offered when my Father shook off the mortal coil or when my Mom ended her reign at 89 years. When our dear pal Ed Carroll's departure shook us to the bone we held eachother up and when my other best friend Timo died too early it was Greg who I called. For this, I write these little stories and will never forget what the man meant to me. I think of the first words of a mutually favorite film "I Never Sang for my Father" that said  "Death ends a life. But it does not end a relationship;which struggles on the survivor's mind,toward some resolution,which it may never find."



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Athletic Club Flower shop

Image
  Athletic Club Flower shop      This phrase is actually the telephone greeting at Greg's uncle Johnny Tassano's flower shop at 808 W. 8th street near Flower street in downtown L.A. Greg loved the place and culled many a story and line from his experiences at a place he worked and visited fondly. Even when he wasn't employed he drove around with cousin Kent (Kevin Smith) and they had a ball observing the absurdities of modern living in the Southland. The phone was answered by different employees and each had a unique turn of "Athletic Club...flowershopppp" There was owner John Tassano, right-hand man Ronald P. Lord, "Speed," a delivery man, and Carmen who cut flowers and told odd anecdotes such as the origin of pizza. I believe Greg and Kevin could go on for weeks about the people they met on their deliveries as they set forth across the city of the angels to spread floral joy. This might include places to eat, fascinating neighborhoods, cemeteries, lone...
Read more

Oil and gas crowd

Image
  Oil and gas crowd       This one comes from cousin  Kevin's bold political action volunteering for the Fred Harris presidential campaign in 1976. Kevin got a terrific piece on the campaign published as an editorial in the Los Angeles Times and also developed an imitation of the candidates speaking voice. Fred Harris was everything you would want in a public servant  and had come close to being asked to be Vice President but his brand was not widely known. Despite representing Oklahoma as a senator Harris managed to be an admirable liberal who favored the Great Society and economic democracy. Way ahead of his time Fred wanted to wrest control away from corporations and millionaires. He travelled in a recreation vehicle wth young Smith aboard to cut down on costs and was as grass roots as it gets. Fred was married to native-american LaDonna and to this day we have buttons stating "LaDonna for First Lady." Kevin would repeat the phrase from Fred's speeches a...
Read more

alright mother

Image
  alright mother- “You can find poetry in your everyday life, your memory, in what people say on the bus, in the news, or just what’s in your heart.” —Carol Ann Duffy  Greg was always delighted by a story told by his mother in law about a "sortie" dinner party attended by a Doctor "Putty" Putnam who had been forced to attend an opera by his wife. When asked by a clueless guest if he enjoyed the opera, his response was  "fuck you!" When I was visiting Bear Cove and sitting next to the matriarch Greg goaded her into telling the tale. But a rum n' coke had loosened "Minnie's" tongue and when she got to Putty's answer she blurted a rather hard FUCK YOU!  Roy, hearing his bride curse thusly said across the table "Alright mother!"
Read more