3 iron up the ass’

 



3 iron up the ass

    True Greg in all his threatening glory. He loved to make outrageous violent threats that he never acted on or intended to act on. It was entertainment value only for friends and family (mostly Ed.) His face might turn red as he summoned up the worst of his righteous anger fantasies toward villains that might drive recklessly, spout lies, bully others, adhere to conspiracies or maybe just act selfishly in a sports crowd or neighborhood. In real life Greg was a gentle and forgiving man but in private you would hear him threaten to knock out someone's teeth, set them on fire, shatter a wine bottle on their skull, curb-stomp mouths, pour hot coffee on their necks or just generally  kick asses from here to Halifax. He particularly despised phony Repbulican politicians and the crown prick prince of those was Vice President Dick Cheney. Greg's eyes would narrow as he described shoving a 3 iron up the ass of Cheney and breaking it off after it reached the guts of the monstrous man. Sometimes he would demonstrate the technique that caused uproarious laughter on mine and his son's part. Even with an Irish temper Greg never as much as bent a club in his bag and probably rarely used a 3 iron. As was said before, Greg never injured anyone in any fight or even sporting contest but he talked one hell of a pier six brawl.




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Paul Knowlton's White Lotus

Image
 Paul Knowlton's White Lotus \      It is ironic that this post is titled something that means nothing to the protagonist. Paul, Zeke, "the Prince," "Senor Suerte" or the Snail (I never called him that.) My old pal just created a memorable vacation on the island of Oahu where the mean old world was a far off nightmare and the closest thing to stress was choosing which kind of massage you would request. Paul was the second friend in my life and we grew up about a block away from each other. We were Catholic boys and loved sports that created a bond lasting seventy years. This connection continued from grammar school to High School, to Community College to University. We were roomates from 1968 to 1972 and our families had a solid respect for one another. Paul grew up in a family of nine kids at a tract house in South Gate when the common man lived the American dream. Then again with 11 mouths to feed the American dream can only stretch so far. It is a cliche but ...
Read more

alright mother

Image
  alright mother- “You can find poetry in your everyday life, your memory, in what people say on the bus, in the news, or just what’s in your heart.” —Carol Ann Duffy  Greg was always delighted by a story told by his mother in law about a "sortie" dinner party attended by a Doctor "Putty" Putnam who had been forced to attend an opera by his wife. When asked by a clueless guest if he enjoyed the opera, his response was  "fuck you!" When I was visiting Bear Cove and sitting next to the matriarch Greg goaded her into telling the tale. But a rum n' coke had loosened "Minnie's" tongue and when she got to Putty's answer she blurted a rather hard FUCK YOU!  Roy, hearing his bride curse thusly said across the table "Alright mother!"
Read more

Athletic Club Flower shop

Image
  Athletic Club Flower shop      This phrase is actually the telephone greeting at Greg's uncle Johnny Tassano's flower shop at 808 W. 8th street near Flower street in downtown L.A. Greg loved the place and culled many a story and line from his experiences at a place he worked and visited fondly. Even when he wasn't employed he drove around with cousin Kent (Kevin Smith) and they had a ball observing the absurdities of modern living in the Southland. The phone was answered by different employees and each had a unique turn of "Athletic Club...flowershopppp" There was owner John Tassano, right-hand man Ronald P. Lord, "Speed," a delivery man, and Carmen who cut flowers and told odd anecdotes such as the origin of pizza. I believe Greg and Kevin could go on for weeks about the people they met on their deliveries as they set forth across the city of the angels to spread floral joy. This might include places to eat, fascinating neighborhoods, cemeteries, lone...
Read more