You've come a long way baby

 


You've come a long way baby


     One of the truly great stories Greg would tell  was word for word pure literature. He recalled a speech given by the intense Father John R. Alvarez who was a beloved teacher at Pius. Alvarez was an odd bird who entered the priesthood after being a grown man with experience in the U.S. Navy. He was rather handsome and mysteriously drove a new Buick every year. The good Father was also a huge sports fan, even coaching lower levels of basketball. Alvarez, like most Catholics from the era was vehemently anti-communist. The nuns and priests insisted that commies were out to destroy the family and religion. Greg had Alvarez for homeroon and I had  him for Religion class a few years earlier. You had to like the teacher who never gave assignments, never taught from a book but just told stories or talked sports for the time in our classrooms. Before we knew any better there was genuine affection for Father Alvarez. We learned almost nothing but were entertained.

     On this particular day, Alvarez arrived in class steamed at commercials that had begun appearing advertising Virginia Slims cigarettes. The wise ad men and women saw the baby steps of feminism as an opportunity to convince the ladies that smoking their cancer-causing tobacco sticks was a way of asserting themselves against the partiarchy. "You've come a long way baby" was on billboards and TV spots all over the place. Alvarez of old school Catholic family values saw these as sins against God and nature. The speech as repeated by Greg with dramatic flair started with:

 "you've come a long way baby!" 

Pregnant pause followed. 

Yes, women are equal to men now

and with just women and no man

you have no marriage

and with no marriage

you have no family

and with no family you have no children

and with no men or marriage or family or children

You have no God

Now think about that

Because that is just what the communists want!!!

     No matter how many times I heard dear Greg repeat this one I never tired of his brilliant interpretation. 






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